


things you said

by EzzyDean



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-19
Updated: 2017-07-19
Packaged: 2018-12-04 03:17:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11546373
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EzzyDean/pseuds/EzzyDean
Summary: we have hundreds of thousands of conversations in our lives.  some are big, some are small, some seem larger than they are.  they don't always mean anything but they're still there.





	things you said

**Author's Note:**

> aka I challenged myself to complete [this list](http://ezzydean.tumblr.com/post/150005856974/send-me-a-pairing-and-one-of-these-and-ill-write) of things you said prompts (40 of them) with only 5 sentences per prompt.
> 
> there is no actual order to these prompts and they basically span from their time in high school all the way through university and into adulthood

**things you said at 1 am**

 

“You’re going to regret it when we have wake up at the crack of dawn for practice.”  Kei looks back at Daichi, eyes skipping around the darkened room and skittering over the still forms of their teammates fast asleep, and shrugs.

 

“Won’t be the first thing I’ve regretted.”

 

Kei slips away into the night, leaving his captain staring at the closed door and no doubt wondering what kind of shit has happened in Kei’s sixteen years that he’s already so callous and jaded.  Kei huffs into the darkness; it wouldn’t be the first time he’s walked away and left someone wondering that.

  
  


 

**things you said through your teeth**

 

“It’s really nothing,” Daichi hisses and bats Sugawara’s hand away from his already bruising face, “just a misunderstanding.”  Daichi’s jaw throbs from how tight he’s clenching it shut but he’s afraid if he loosens it even a little all the words crowding his throat will start spilling out, all the words that he knows Tsukishima doesn’t want to - can’t allow himself to - hear right now.  “Right, Tsukishima?”

 

“Right,” Tsukishima grits out, fingers curling and twitching against his leg like he wants nothing more than to deck Daichi again.  “A misunderstanding.”

  
  


 

**things you said too quietly**

 

“I want to play,” Kei murmurs to himself, flexing his fingers and watching the ball arc through the air, powerful and graceful and his fingers itch to make contact with that familiar surface.  “I want to keep playing.”

 

Daichi makes a receive that sends him sprawling to the court and scrambling back on his feet a moment later, his entire being focused on the game.  There may not be any tournaments and championships and rankings to compete for anymore but that doesn’t stop that clawing urge in Kei’s chest when the opponent’s spike breaks through and slams to the court.

 

“I want to stand next to him again.”

  
  


 

**things you said over the phone**

 

“I don’t understand why it’s such a difficult concept to grasp, the whole privacy thing that is.  I mean I know things are different no matter where you go but you’d think that it would be understood that if I have my door shut then that would mean I don’t wish to speak to his pompous freckled face or see his disgustingly product filled hair or hear his dumb voice trying to fill in all the silences in a room that I very much prefer to be silent.  Does he not understand that I am not a talkative person and that I like my silences unfilled and occasionally hovering between people dramatically?”

 

Daichi snorts and makes some sort of noise that Kei takes as a prompt to continue.  Daichi spends the next forty-five minutes drowning himself in Kei’s voice as Kei reminds him of just how ‘not talkative’ he is when he’s stuck rooming with someone he dislikes passionately.

  
  


 

**things you didn’t say at all**

 

Daichi lingers in the doorway and watches Tsukishima with his classmates.  Watches the way Tsukishima rolls his eyes even as he allows them to shove him around the room in the rolling desk chair he’s seated in.  Watches the smile that grows as they all start laughing.  A smile that flickers and settles into something small but confident and private when one spin of the chair puts Daichi in Tsukishima’s line of sight.

 

Sometimes it’s hard for Daichi to walk away from Tsukishima even when he has to.

  
  


 

**things you said under the stars and in the grass**

 

“You don’t always have to do whatever you think they’re expecting you to you know.  You can just be yourself.”

 

“I don’t even know who I am most days.”

 

“Some days I wonder if any of us really know who we are or if are all just really good at pretending.”

 

Cool grass prickles at bare necks and tickles through their t-shirts as the sky expands forever above them, stars blanketing the dark sky and holding all the secrets that two boys share under their watch.

  
  


 

**things you said while we were driving**

 

“Are you singing along to this song?”

 

Tsukishima turns his head slowly and stares at Daichi, who can only afford to take his eyes off the road for a moment to glance back, and huffs at him before turning back to look out the windshield.

 

“You have a problem with that?”

 

“Not at all,” Daichi laughs and turns up the music.  They sing until their voices are hoarse and the sun is dipping past the horizon and splashing pinks and purples into the clouds.

  
  


 

**things you said when you were crying**

 

“Leave me alone.”  Kei hates when he cries and hates it a hundred times more that Daichi is here with him to witness it.  He doesn’t want hugs and sympathetic words and gentle touches on his arms; they make him lash out and struggle to cut away every piece of gentleness and every tie he has to other people.  “Leave me alone before I walk out that door and never come back.  I despise you right now.”

 

 

**things you said when i was crying**

 

“Please,” Daichi whispers and digs his fingers into Tsukishima’s shoulder.  “Please just let me have this.”  He doesn’t swipe at his tears with anger or embarrassment.  He holds strong.  Until Tsukishima turns and Daichi sinks against him and lets himself break into pieces, confident that Tsukishima will hold them until Daichi can bear to be made whole again.

  
  


 

**things you said that made me feel like shit**

 

“I’m not going to be your replacement for him forever you know.”

 

“I can’t ask him for forever either, he doesn’t want that, doesn’t want me.”

 

“He’s told you?”

 

“As clearly as he can without telling me one way or the other what he wants from me and I just want to forget for tonight,” Daichi pleads with Tanaka and Kei swallows hard as he tries to convince himself to make his presence known, to stop hiding in the bathroom stall, to walk away from Daichi once and for all and end both of their miseries instead of constantly dragging Daichi around like this.

 

Tanaka sounds sad and Kei can picture him shaking his head as he says, “Tonight I can do,” before the bathroom door swings open and the sounds of the club mask Daichi’s reply as they leave.

  
  


 

**things you said when you were drunk**

 

“’M pretty sure I love him and tha’ scares the everlovin’ piss out of me.”  Kei leans heavily against Noya’s shoulder and knows he should stop talking and stop drinking and stop spilling his woes to his former high school teammate but Noya had looked so sincere when he had sat down and asked Kei what was wrong and Kei had stopped counting drinks somewhere around five and Daichi was nowhere in sight and Kei figured if anyone would understand it would be Noya though he’s not sure why he figures that but it made sense when he first opened his mouth.  “I mean it’s me and it’s him and I love ‘im more than I thought I could love anyone and now I get what my mom used to mean about my dad and-”

 

Movement across the room drags his drunk gaze to it and he watches as Daichi makes a face at something someone says before he looks over and meets Kei’s gaze and Kei’s heart starts swimming in his chest.

 

“Oh shit it’s him,” he slurs drunkenly and turns to Noya in a panic even as Daichi makes his way over, “quick Noya-san hide me.”

  
  


 

**things you said when you thought i was asleep**

 

Strong fingers card through his hair and Daichi snuggles closer to the source of warmth in bed with him.  He buries his nose in Kei’s hip and nuzzles the edge of Kei’s shorts just to hear Kei snort in amusement at Daichi.

 

“Thank you for giving up on me all those years ago,” Kei whispers softly, apparently thinking Daichi is still asleep, “and thank you for taking me back anyway.”

 

Daichi valiantly refuses to acknowledge the statement and, instead, snuffles sleepily and grunts softly and lets Kei get lost in his memories, content in the knowledge that Kei will be there when he wakes up again.

  
  


 

**things you said at the kitchen table**

 

“I think I’m going to - oh this feels so odd to say - listen to Hinata’s suggestion and take that trip with my brother.”  Kei’s voice is soft and a little unsure and Daichi’s stuck trying to figure out why until Kei’s fingers slide across the table and nervously tuck themselves between Daichi’s own.

 

Daichi raises Kei’s hands to his lips.  “I’ll be here when you get back,” he says, lips brushing Kei’s knuckles and eyes never leaving his face.

 

—

 

“Welcome home,” Daichi says a month later when Kei drops his duffel bag on the kitchen floor and nearly collapses into Daichi’s lap with the kitchen table pressing into his back as he curls into Daichi’s lap.

  
  


 

**things you said after you kissed me**

 

Kei tries to tug his hand out of Daichi’s grip, tries to squirm away from the sensation of Daichi pressing kisses from his palm all the way up his arm and across his shoulder and up his neck before ending with a great smacking kiss on Kei’s cheek.

 

“Are you satisfied now that you got that out of your system?”

 

Daichi’s fingers are warm but Kei’s cheek is even warmer, blush starting to spread down to his throat, as Daichi grins down at him from his spot on Kei’s lap.

 

“I’ll never get you out of my system,” Daichi states before he curls down and draws Kei up into a soft, lingering kiss.

 

“Sap,” Kei replies even as he tugs Daichi back down.

  
  


 

**things you said with too many miles between us**

 

“You know I love you, right?”  

 

Daichi pauses, bottle of water halfway to his mouth, and looks at the computer screen.  It’s hard to tell with a video call on their admittedly crappy laptops but he’s pretty sure Kei is staring fixedly at something just over Daichi’s shoulder.  No doubt the picture of the two of them that Daichi keeps at the center of the photo collage on his living room wall.

 

“I know.”

  
  


 

**things you said with no space between us**

 

“If you’re going to insist on cuddling when the temperature outside is like the depths of hell then I’m going to have to insist on you showering first so you’re at least a little cool before you latch onto me.”  Daichi pushes at Tsukishima’s torso, fingers sliding along the sweaty skin to no avail.

 

Tsukishima lets out a laugh that tests Daichi’s will.  He would do a lot of things to keep hearing Tsukishima laugh like that, all relaxed and content.  Including cuddling when they’re both covered in sweat and it’s approximately a million degrees outside apparently.

  
  


 

**things you said that i wish you hadn’t**

 

“Of course Hinata can stay with me while his apartment is being remodeled.”

 

Kei stares at Daichi and reminds himself that he loves this man: loves his stupid smile and big stupid heart and stupid kindness.

 

Hinata yells in happiness and slaps Kei’s arm as he bounces on the couch beside him.

 

“I really wish you hadn’t said that,” Kei grumbles.  He’s already lamenting the loss of his quiet nights and the sanctuary-like feel that Daichi’s apartment has always given him.

  
  


 

**things you said when you were scared**

 

“I am going to kill you for talking me into this.”  Daichi grabs Kei’s arm and digs his fingers in.  There’s probably going to be a bruise later but Kei is enjoying the feel of strong, solid, dependable Sawamura Daichi clinging to him and muttering under his breath as they make their way through the jump-scare infested haunted house.  “I hate you so much right now.”

 

Kei rolls his eyes and tugs Daichi closer as they slip into the next room.

  
  


 

**things you said when we were the happiest we ever were**

 

“Pretty sure I could fall asleep right here.”  Kei pillows his head on his arms for a moment and studies the tabletop inches from his nose.  Daichi’s weight presses against his side and he feels Daichi’s head roll onto his shoulder.

 

“Same,” Daichi yawns out.  “Same.”

  
  


 

**things you said that i wasn’t meant to hear**

 

Kei freezes at the sound of Daichi’s voice coming from the bathroom.  “I can’t just walk away from him Suga.  I don’t think that was ever an option.”

 

He inches towards the door even though he knows he shouldn’t listen.  “Because I’m pretty sure I’ve been at least half in love with him for about five years and more than half the last five months.”

 

Kei slips out of Daichi’s apartment before he can hear anything else that sends his entire world spinning a hundred different directions.

  
  
  


 

**things you said when we were on top of the world**

 

“Congratulations, Captain,” Tsukishima’s voice is almost lost in the roar of the crowd in the stands and the shouts on the court around them.  Daichi has to grab Tsukishima’s arm and drag him close to hear him properly.  “You earned it and you deserve every moment.”

 

Daichi doesn’t get the chance to tell Tsukishima he’s earned it too before they’re both swept opposite directions into their friends’ arms.

 

It’s okay, though, he can tell Tsukishima later.

  
  


 

**things you said after it was over**

 

“Just, let go, Tsukishima.”  Daichi’s sad smile rips at what little self-control Kei has left.  “Whatever we have - or don’t have - right now is done.”

 

—

 

“I  _ am _ sorry,” Kei whispers to his knees as he watches Daichi walk away.  He wraps his arms tighter around his knees and draws them close to his chest where he thinks his heart might be trying to cut through his bones and skin and let in the warm spring air.

  
  


 

**things you said when you were half asleep**

 

“But I never understood why he was always trying to be my friend.  Like I was terrible to him but other than Tadashi he was the one person who refused to let me tear him down.”  Daichi smiles and pulls Tsukishima closer to him, sighing contently when Tsukishima nuzzles into his chest and continues to mutter sleepily.  “Hinata is a damn menace.  That’s the only explanation I have for his weirdness.”

  
  


**things you said when we were alone**

 

“I really shouldn’t be allowed to cook.  That’s the only solution.”  Daichi stares forlornly at the remains of what was once the ingredients for a simple rice and chicken dish.

 

“I would ask how you managed that but I don’t think I want to know.”  Kei scrapes out what he can into the trash and sets the pan in the sink to soak.

  
  


 

**things you said in front of other people**

 

“Are you sure about coming back, Tsukki?  The position you’re looking at taking is in the same office as Daichi.”

 

Kei lets out a long breath and shakes his head at his best friend.  “I’m sure this is the best move for me.  Whatever happens with Daichi happens.”

  
  


 

**things you said in writing**

 

_ Tsukishima- _

 

_ I know that you’re going to be okay.   _

 

_ Hopefully someday we can be okay again too. _

 

_ Whatever comes from the future please know that I never have and never will regret us. _

 

_ -Daichi _

  
  


 

**things you said through a closed door**

 

“Can I come in,” Daichi’s voice is stilted and his words slip through his clenched teeth.

 

“No,” Kei whines.

 

“What am I supposed to do then?”

 

“Go throw up in the sink or something I don’t care.”

 

When they both collapse into bed later that night they agree: its the last time they end a night of drinking with their coworkers by eating whatever leftovers are in Daichi’s fridge without actually looking to make sure they are edible.

  
  


 

**things you said in the dark**

 

“And I suppose you had nothing to do with this?”  Daichi squirms and does his best not to jab his knees or elbows into some soft part of Tsukishima’s body.

 

“Really,” Tsukishima drawls, “do I seem like the kind of person to come up with ‘locking them in a closet’ as a method to get people to talk?”

 

“I would say it would depend on how much the people have pissed you off or how vindictive you were feeling.”

 

Tsukishima snorts and catches Daichi’s elbow before it can catch him in the ribs and manages to maneuver them into a fairly comfortable position, despite them still being a tangle of limbs in a dark closet.

  
  


 

**things you s** **aid in the rain**

 

“The only thing keeping you off this team is the fact you’re too stubborn to ask to join.”  Daichi rubs at his damp hair as he steps up beside Tsukishima and they both observe the rain pouring down outside the gym the neighborhood team plays in.  “Which is pretty par for the course, actually; you being stubborn and all that.”

 

“What do you have to lose if you ask,” Daichi calls out as he jogs out into the rain with one last look at Tsukishima.

 

He doesn’t hear what Tsukishima says in answer but he sees the determination in Tsukishima’s eyes and that’s enough of an answer for him for the time being.

  
  


 

**things I wish you’d said**

 

“You never had any opinions.  You just let me get away with anything and everything and you never argued or criticized or said you didn’t really want to do something.  You just went along with whatever I wanted and I hated it.  I hated it and I hated you for never speaking up and forcing me to see what I was doing and I hated myself for never asking you to and never being able to apologize for it.”

 

“I know,” Daichi whispers, “and that’s why I had to give up back then.”

  
  


 

**things you said right before goodbye**

 

“This isn’t going to work.”  Daichi watches Tsukishima sink to the ground and pull his knees to his chest.  He hates himself right now but he has to do this if they ever want a chance in the future to be anything more than the mess they are now.  “Maybe someday but… not now.”

 

It would almost be better, he thinks, if Tsukishima would look angry or haughty or condescending instead of this pale blank canvas of a person curling in on himself.

 

 

**things you said right after hello**

 

“So it looks like we’ll be working together again.”  Tsukishima’s smile is genuine and relaxed and he strolls over to Daichi with a confidence that Daichi can’t remember ever seeing Tsukishima having before.  His time away had certainly done Tsukishima well.

 

“Looks like it,” Daichi replies pleasantly.  “It’s good to see you again Tsukishima.”

  
  


 

**things you said from across the room**

 

_ We should get out of here _ , Tsukishima mouths to Daichi, music thumping and rattling the walls as the party swells around them.

 

Daichi nods and jerks his chin towards the kitchen where he knows there’s a door into the backyard.

 

_ Five minutes _ , Daichi mouths back.  The music pulsing around him isn’t the reason his heart is leaping in his throat as Tsukishima nods sharply and makes his way out of the living room.  Tanaka shoots him a look and Daichi shakes his head; he’s fine despite whatever Tanaka’s thinking at the moment.

  
  


 

**things you whispered in my ear**

 

“I think you’re doing that wrong,” Kei breathes against Daichi’s ear, voice sending shivers down his spine and popping goosebumps up along his arms.  Daichi’s fingers clench around the screwdriver in his hand.

 

“Would you like to try to do it yourself?”  Daichi gently pokes Kei’s side with the screwdriver.

 

Kei arches an eyebrow as he asks, “Do I look like a handyman to you?”

  
  


 

**things you said at the top of your lungs**

 

“Come home with me,” Daichi yells into Kei’s ear, nearly bursting something in an attempt to be heard over the crazy bass beat rattling the glasses on the table next to them.  Kei tilts his head and watches Daichi from the corner of his eye as he tries to find one of the teammates from their neighborhood team that they came with.  Everyone has apparently conveniently disappeared from the basement they had been lead to a couple hours earlier.  Which is just as well.  Since that means there’s no one that actually knows them to see when he leans in close to Daichi’s ear and tells him that he’d be happy to go home with him.

  
  


 

**things you said but didn’t mean**

 

“I do not have feelings for Daichi-san,” Kei states evenly.  It’s been a week since Yamaguchi and Hinata had gotten it in their heads that he had some sort of massive crush on their captain and they’ve been driving him insane with their insistences that he go talk to Daichi about it.

 

“Yeah and you don’t like volleyball,” Yamaguchi says innocently enough, though he rolls his eyes in a way that Kei feels a little proud of seeing as how Yamaguchi picked it up from him.

 

“I don’t like volleyball.”  The words ring hollow even to him and he clenches his tape wrapped fingers at the look Yamaguchi shoots him.

  
  


 

**things you said through someone else**

 

“Hey, Daichi, Tsukishima wanted me to let you know that he won’t be here tonight.  Something about sunshine and cats and there were a few curses in there?  I assume you know what that means?”

 

Daichi laughs even as he starts adjusting his mental schedule to make time for winding Kei down from whatever his adventure with Hinata will be.  “Yeah I got it.”

  
  


 

**things you said when I was (you were) sick**

 

“You know I don’t want to say I told you so-”

 

“You always want to say I told you so.”

 

“-but I told you so.”  Kei gives Daichi the small cup of cold medicine and watches as he downs it with a grimace and grabs eagerly for the cup of tea Kei has in his other hand to wash it down with.  “Why do you insist on letting Asahi and Kuroo goad you into doing such ridiculous things?”

  
  


 

**things you forgot to say**

 

“Uh, surprise?”  Kei smiles as innocently and winningly as he can when Daichi freezes in the doorway.  He knows the scene behind him is utter chaos - Hinata and Tadashi and Kuroo and Asahi and Suga are all crowded in the kitchen and it’s rather covered in mess everywhere - and he does his best to distract Daichi with a warm kiss before he tries to tug him out of the kitchen and deeper into the apartment.  “Okay so I may have forgotten to tell you that I offered your kitchen to Suga and Tadashi so they could work on practicing their wedding desserts and I’m not sure how the others got involved or dragged into the apartment but I-”

 

Kei’s words die off as Daichi starts laughing.

  
  


 

**things you interrupted me to say**

 

“I love you,” Kei says quietly one night. They’re sitting on his couch and teetering on the edge between ‘should I go back to my own apartment or can I get away with staying the night again’ for the fifth time this week.

 

Daichi pauses in the middle of his sentence and stares at Kei.

 

“I love you too,” he replies, just as quietly.

**Author's Note:**

> you can come yell at me on [ tumblr ](http://ezzydean.tumblr.com) if you want to


End file.
